I was working in the Palliative Care Unit at Vanderbilt when the pandemic hit. Palliative Care is a specialty in medical care that focuses on treating the symptoms of a disease that cannot be cured. Sometimes it leads straight into end of life care in a short period of time. I had been doing this work for the past 7 years and found it rewarding and that it was my calling.

Whether I am playing or experiencing it, music always continues to enrich my life. I consider it a gift to be able to step onto a stage and forget about everything except for the task at hand. I always receive back ten-fold what I put out into the environment as a performer. It is a shot of adrenaline to my spirit that I am always grateful to experience. It truly is magical.

It is a song that I love because it digs hard into what it feels like to ‘not belong’ and the wretched place of being in comparison with someone else. It reminds me of when I wasn’t cool in junior high, and also now, when I wonder where I fit in. I think in general I resist ‘fitting in’ because I know it doesn’t serve me well to give myself over to someone else’s standards.